I realized I'm a true dog person when I had a dinner of plain pasta and a stolen snickers bar, because I couldn't afford anything more than that after buying my dog's prescription food.
2010-03-09 11:51:38 / Rating: 161 / 
Story archives - tag: "food"
Curry Cretin
When my Nepali housemate walked in on me heating up curry from a tin, I seriously considered moving out.
2010-02-01 11:17:45 / Rating: 55 /
Kimberley
I ate a baked potato like an apple, because I was too lazy to go downstairs for a fork.
2009-10-22 20:46:29 / Rating: 167.5 /
drummergrrrl
I was relieved when my middle-school friend revealed to me that, unlike what my mother had told me, hot dogs were not the penises of pigs.
2009-07-13 16:06:57 / Rating: 202.25 /
e coli
My pit bull-rottweiler only eats cat treats and is scared of my eight pound cat.
2009-06-29 14:03:01 / Rating: 262 /
hollie
While I was walking home from work, it started raining heavily just as I was about to pass my favorite restaurant.
2009-05-04 11:30:06 / Rating: 112.25 /
Bg
I learned a valuable life leason tonight: never eat 50% discounted sushi.
2009-03-19 08:57:16 / Rating: 293.5 /
Ellie
I stood in the cereal aisle for ten minutes trying to pick the Marshmallow Mateys bag with the highest marshmallow-to-anchor ratio.
2008-12-05 13:03:14 / Rating: 523.25 /
Arktoi
With a melodramatic sigh, she declared she was a "bad vegetarian today" and wolfed down a double bacon cheeseburger, and I wondered how I could be so vehemently opposed to violence against animals and still want to punch this human in the mouth.
2008-12-04 13:14:27 / Rating: 325 /
Rae
It wasn't until I sat down at the table that I realized I had drizzled maple syrup over my kung pao tofu instead of soy sauce.
2008-11-14 15:22:40 / Rating: 241 /
Basilisk
It was at that moment that I realized just how similar are the tastes of fresh fish and week old, unrefrigerated turkey.
2008-09-03 13:53:46 / Rating: 197.25 /
Courtney
I took a huge bite of rice pudding only to realize that it was actually tartar sauce.
2008-08-14 20:37:55 / Rating: 436.5 /
Cara
I discovered in front of the entire store that gourmet dog biscuits look like, but do not taste like, people cookies.
2008-07-21 15:36:48 / Rating: 294.25 /
Jess
When I finally got to the gym I realized I'd forgotten my ID, so I came home, ate a sandwich and took a nap instead.
2008-06-02 13:53:32 / Rating: 435 /
Ryan
The orange sat in my bag for another day because I continued refusing to admit that oranges are just too messy to eat at work.
2008-05-28 16:08:49 / Rating: 215.75 /
Lola
Even though it's too late to ask the question: is it okay to eat onion rings out of the trash, as long as they are on top?
2008-05-05 10:11:51 / Rating: 216.5 /
Perplexious
I used to think a futon was a cross between a crouton and a wonton, and would always get weird looks from the waitstaff when I'd try to order one at an Asian restaurant.
2008-04-28 10:27:35 / Rating: 393 /
Mark
At four, Sam ordered his first hamburger, and when the waitress asked, "Certainly, sir, medium?" replied indignantly, "No, large!"
2008-04-10 15:40:07 / Rating: 554.25 /
Sid
I was at the dentist and I burped, then he told me what I had for breakfast.
2008-01-29 15:30:56 / Rating: 382.25 /
Ryan
The kid at the checkout decided it was efficient and eco-friendly to pack my bag of potatoes into a separate plastic bag... by itself.
2008-01-23 17:16:36 / Rating: 222.5 /
Sunshine
After I insisted he finish the leftover tomato soup that "tasted funny," I remembered I ate the rest of soup for lunch yesterday.
2008-01-11 13:59:01 / Rating: 375.5 /
The Guru
Eating--alone--the warm brownie covered by cold vanilla ice cream and smothered with thick chocolate syrup sure beat finding the highway in the dark.
2007-11-09 11:05:10 / Rating: 259.25 /
Dormouse
Burping the taste of Goldfish is one of life's wonderful things.
2007-11-02 14:39:29 / Rating: 282.5 /
Pfannkuchen
Sometimes I'm surprised by how a simple thing like pancakes and coffee on a rainy day can temporarily nullify everything negative.
2007-10-25 10:20:50 / Rating: 491.75 /
Dormouse
Life's too short to stop eating apples.
2007-10-23 11:47:50 / Rating: 270.5 /
Jessica
Expiration dates are there for a reason.
2007-10-16 11:05:40 / Rating: 294.25 /
Tams
Bananas taste so much sweeter when mashed before spreading them on toast
2007-10-11 11:16:07 / Rating: 218 /
Inga
I can only hope that my spaghetti surprise dinner party isn't a complete disaster, but it doesn't help that I don't even have enough cutlery for eight guests.
2007-10-08 17:34:00 / Rating: 216 /
I Heart Chocolate
I never liked food containing anything soy until the realization that they help me lose weight.
2007-09-13 13:51:16 / Rating: 264 /
sweetie
I informed my husband that I wanted a divorce after he told me that he doesn't like marshmallows.
2007-08-14 16:58:54 / Rating: 323.5 /
Snarkmeister
The typo on the Chinese food take-out menu claimed that their Garlic Shrimp contained "flesh mushrooms," and now I can't eat there without giggling like a twelve year old.
2007-08-07 16:19:05 / Rating: 422.25 /
Kiiiile
Having finally tried Chipotle I am, now more then ever, convinced of the supreme awesomeness of the Panchero's burrito.
2007-07-11 12:57:42 / Rating: 209.25 /
Unsung Hero
I once ate a whole jar of peanut butter (the crunchy kind) just to see if I could, and all I got was constipation for a week.
2007-07-06 11:18:47 / Rating: 278 /
Stuff
The broccoli-cheese potato was perfectly cooked, but the pickles mysteriously had corn on them.
2007-07-03 17:11:33 / Rating: 260.75 /
J. Puer
Having bent all of our spoons my mother finally bought an ice cream scoop.
2007-07-02 14:35:38 / Rating: 404.5 /
Brandon
That was the day I learned that tacos don't mix with vodka and skydiving.
2007-06-26 16:56:18 / Rating: 370.25 /
I've Tasted Flight
Upon asking my 5-year old son how many hotdogs he wanted for dinner, he said, "Ninety-nine five."
2007-06-14 16:52:34 / Rating: 319 /
Jen
They thought it was weird that I ate molasses on my cheese.
2007-06-14 14:56:59 / Rating: 295.25 /
It Burns
The regret came not when I chopped chilli for tea but much later on, when I picked my nose.
2007-03-27 17:12:16 / Rating: 449.25 /
lord onan
She's eleven years old and she eats like a pro wrestler.
2007-03-27 14:03:17 / Rating: 312.75 /
zooey
Only later did I realize that the taxi driver wasn't making an obscene gesture, but rather, trying to inform me that I had left a box of takeout on the roof of my car.
2006-12-18 13:59:44 / Rating: 594.5 /
Baron Raymundo
To this very day my kid brother still won't touch anything if I tell him it tastes like chocolate.
2006-11-29 15:16:20 / Rating: 424.25 /
Sheik Damo
I just made a nice sandwich and it has gravy.
2006-11-21 09:55:35 / Rating: 298.75 /
LikeSoy
I don't eat meat, because my mother's friend ate our pet cow.
2006-11-08 13:09:18 / Rating: 320 /
KC
I stared at the bucket of stale cheese puffs in disbelief and thought, "I can't believe I paid 9 bucks to eat at this lousy Chinese buffet!"
2006-11-01 16:17:48 / Rating: 296.5 /
Sam
Well, I thought as I hit the floor in a daze, this is the last time I'll ever eat at *this* sushi bar.
2006-10-30 15:01:48 / Rating: 364.5 /
Jeff
I spilled the lasagna I made for dinner, on the carpet.
2006-08-22 09:44:31 / Rating: 318 /
aharris
After two years, I finally realized that veal is not made from baby cats.
2006-08-10 16:25:20 / Rating: 399 /
ernie
I ate some berries yesterday that I used to think weren't good for eating but they were very good for eating, tasting, and making me feel alright!
2006-07-10 08:52:47 / Rating: 247.25 /